2.2.2014-The second month. Hey! What's that?

Already, it is February? When did that happen? It was just December when I was getting initiated in all this madness, and now it's February?!

Oh, well. I think the real evidence of the time that has passed is how much I miss what people would say is "back home." It may sound upsetting, but I really do not miss it all that much. In fact, the only places that I miss are those that I would travel to on holiday. Maybe some people would claim that I am not being sentimental enough, but in reality, it is quite the opposite. My sentimentality is well-intact. The focus of it, though, is not in the past but rather in the present and the future. Do not get me wrong, I love my family and friends, and I miss them all very much, but I also think that they will always support me in the decisions (especially the big ones) that I make. With love, you want to hold on to the things and people you love most, but in the end, true love has the understanding that some things need to be let go in order to blossom and grow.
Now, I'm branching out, and it's beyond frightening for me, but I've realized that if I puff out my chest a little, and take a step closer, the reality isn't as bad as I expected it to be.
Now, here I am, waiting in my current classroom, looking at the list of 51 names (and probably counting) that I will be interviewing today.


.....and hour later
Just kidding! I actually have 66 names, and have already added two more to my list of interviewees. This is fun. The most difficult part is to get the people I have never met to start talking. The ones I have met, they talk... a lot more than when I first met them. I love it.
As for testing levels, I think the best way to place people is into three levels (for now):  Beginner, Intermediate 1, and Intermediate 2. I do not think that, at this time, many people can be in the advanced class, but there are some students who are less advanced, and some that are more advanced but still in the intermediate levels.

Back to my thought process of living abroad. I love it, and I keep loving it more and more as I stay longer. I am not quite sure I want to come back to America in a year, or even two. Some people already know this, others don't. Well, now you do. And by coming back, I do also mean for visiting. If I have a holiday, I will not come to America, I will go somewhere else, maybe with friends, but for exploration purposes, to add more exotic stamps to my passport. I would apologize, but if I'm not sincere about it, then there is no purpose to the apology.

My friend, she is also living abroad as an Au pair in a town near Paris. She also has a blog, which you can read here.
She wrote a passage which discusses her experience of living as an Au pair, and what preparation measures she took to arrive, and what she wants people to know that they need to do BEFORE they decide to come to work.

Now, my work is a tad bit different, but there are a lot of concepts I agree with that are in this article. I decided I wanted to travel abroad to teach English as a second language, but in the hospital environment, not only for children or adults. The reasons I could make of why I wanted to do this are plenty: I have an interest in working in the hospital, I wanted to travel abroad now because I was unable to during my time at the university, I wanted to make a difference, I wanted to mature, I wanted to be somewhere else, but most importantly, I wanted to make something of myself. This job entitled me to creativity and talking with people, all while I could learn and make friends, but have an amazing experience in my life that I would be able to reminisce in during my decrepit years (I hope that will never happen, and that I will never be conserved to a lying in a bed all day, I just don't believe in it.)
As for the lessons I have learned (which I obviously should've learned when I was being told way back when, but of course did not listen to), here are Just a few:

Do. Your. Research. : I cannot stress this enough. Really, do your research. What is it that you need to do in order to stay or work abroad? If you are working, you will need a work permit so that you are legally working in the country. It would really suck for you if you happened to have been caught working illegally. A lot of hassle for a little money... Also, what are the visa requirements? If you want to work in Thailand, you need to find a company who will hire you, and be able to provide documentation, an intent to hire you, their tax information, location information, and so forth. For them to hire you, they also need to have your documentation, such as diplomas or certificates. For teaching, you may need a teaching certificate, especially in the application process for a visa or work permit. If you are teaching at a school, you might be required to provide a criminal background check. Simple things that you need to be able to learn about before you leave. It saves you the hassle of being caught with your pants down.
While you may have the opportunity to choose where you want to live, your research needs to involve you looking at the locations you can teach. Different schools or job opportunities look for different things: how much experience do you have? Where will you teach? In a school, a learning facility, in a factory? What will the job offer you? Will they pay for your visa and work permit? Is there on-site training? Will they help you find a place to live or offer you a place to live that is nearby? Will they give you a stipend? What about travel assistance? These are things you have to consider.

Budgeting:

I must say that I have been very lucky in this. I don't have much of a social life outside of work, so I am not blowing my earnings away on going out and travel events. As I say this, though, I am growing my social circles, and am receiving invites to go out. In Thailand, many people are very friendly and will pay for a foreigner, especially if they invited the foreigner to eat with them. Normally, it is fairly inexpensive to eat food, so it isn't a big deal. The longer you stay, the more you are expected to pay for your own food. And when you go out... ah, well, you are expected to pitch into the pot when there is alcohol involved, you either pay for your own bottles, or you split the cost of the bulk. If you are going out every weekend, (much less, every night), don't expect to have a thick wallet. Alcohol is pretty much the same price everywhere (more expensive when you go out). Also, excursions cost money, too. If you want to travel, plan ahead, plan how much money you should be spending, and if you are on a budget, don't go for that five star hotel, or even the Marriott. The cost of familiarity far exceeds its value; find a place that is relatively inexpensive, and it shouldn't be extremely spacious with many rooms. Think about it, why travel to another place if you are only going to stay in the hotel? If you are there to explore the place, the hotel room is really only serving as a bed, and maybe breakfast.
Also, I talk about budgeting, I am not only referring to budgeting your finances, but also your social budget. What invites are you receiving, to where? What are your current obligations? Do you need to grade papers? Do you need to plan your upcoming week of lessons? Do you need to change anything or plan an activity? Your social budget is very important overall in the work place. You need to learn to prioritize. Even if you really want to go celebrate a massive holiday that everybody else is celebrating, you might need to hold off on that because you have a project with a deadline that is coming soon.
My social budgeting limits my going out because it involves my other "job," which basically is my role as a live-in nanny-maid. I have a curfew of about 8:30 PM, and technically ask for permission to go to dinner maybe once to twice every two weeks, meaning I won't be able to be a nanny for a night. I call to check-in of my current location status. This comes with the live-in life I have acquired. I do not mind it, but there is no benefit to reap, and at this point of the live-in agreement, I think we are approaching a mutual termination. Meaning, I should be moving out in the next month or so into a single apartment that is close to work, and in a safe place. I am looking at places now (yahoo!) and going to further learn about personal financial budgeting.

Speaking the Language:
Okay, so Thai isn't exactly a language that an English speaker can moderately understand if they have never heard it in their life... I have not yet heard a cognate. The good news is that, even if you can not speak their language, many people are more than happy to help you in whatever your troubles are, and can speak some English. Trust me, a lot of the Thai people would love to speak to you and practice their English, but they are just really shy, afraid that they sound terrible (a feeling, any language-learner feels, I'm sure), and a common characteristic is that many people want to save face, and not be embarrassed at their not perfect English.

Teaching

Here's a tip: ENCOURAGE. Really, encourage the people you meet, especially your students (if you are teaching), to speak, no matter how bad their English is. As a starting step, you can show them what you have learned in Thai, and it may be terrible, and make them giggle. This can be effective to help bring comfort to them to speak. To keep encouraging a student to speak, give them words to read out loud, simple ones. This will help them feel less incapacitated at speaking. Really, don't give them something like "The adjoining chalkboards clicked away as the students quickly wrote their answers, shifting their glances at each other." This is easy for an English-speaker, but if you are just learning the sounds that accompany letters, and are given blended sounds. your brain will melt, and then you will feel inefficient.
Simplify, show pictures, tell a simple joke, dance, show videos, use music, anything, but give energy and excitement to the teaching, so that students can get excited to learn. Your enthusiasm is encouragement, especially when they get something correct, or make a small success, you tell them they did it, and give them plenty of support. Your students will remember that feeling, and will want more, and they will push more.
Also, don't be afraid to change a lesson. If something isn't working, it probably won't work even if you keep trying it. (you know that saying: "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results" ....yep) Change the method.

Learning
If you can, see if you can start learning the language and the culture. This will help you understand why people act the way they do in the country, what is considered appropriate, what isn't. Learning the language will help you in growing your independence. It also helps you put yourself in the shoes of your students. Like the feeling of being able to bargain a price down for those cute pair of shoes, or asking for directions to a place. Trust me, it's a lot of fun.

Be prepared for anything

This is another one of those things people need, to be ready to expect anything. This applies to both the good and the bad. For example, it took me about four months to secure a job, and I was technically on a tourist visa, which meant that I needed to do a few visa runs. It wasn't fun, but it was a necessity. Also, I had to change flight plans due to timing difficulties for my Non-Immigrant B visa, which meant that I needed to cancel a flight, and add another. I lost money, which was not fun, but everything still worked out. Being prepared for anything is very important, so that is things do not work out, you have a backup plan. Also, the concept of time isn't as strict for Thai people, it seems, as it is in America. Things move a lot more slowly. This is not technically a bad thing, but it takes a lot of adjustment. I have to learn to slow things down as well, which meant that I needed to take a breath every now and then. I'm still learning this practice.

Lastly,

Appreciate Where You Are.

How many people can say that they have done what you have done? Maybe right now, things aren't going the way you want them to. Maybe life is uneventful for you right at this moment. Now, go talk to one of your friends back home, and just talk, they will listen to you. Do you know why? Because they know that you are in a place that they can only dream of (at the moment). They think that you might be helping the sick or the poor, playing with tigers, swimming in exotic waters. They want to hear of your stories, no matter how dull you might think they may be. To them, you are the Indiana Jones of fruit when you go to a massive fruit farm and instagram all of the fantastic food you eat. Cherish in this moment. Tell them about the problems you might be having in the country, culturally, socially, touristically... They might want to come visit you. Talk to them about the toilets that you have to squat over, and use a plastic pot to pour water in as a flushing method.
Just trust me. Where you are and what you are doing is amazing, even if it doesn't seem so now. Live in the moment, look toward the future, but don't rely on it. Who knows? Tomorrow you could be in a wild motorbike-car accident.


That is my input. I am happy where I am, I want to share it with the world, I want to learn and absorb, and I want to continue to grow. If there is anybody who is providing obstacle, or no support to this, don't associate with them. The reality is, the more they say the negative things, the more you will hear them, and start to listen to them and believe in this negativity. Don't succumb. Use that backup plan.

Until next time,
K.

P.S.-I want to hear any insight or questions you may have. Preferably not from my family.

12.1.2014(2557) Learning as I Go

Hello, journal, and the rest of the audience who reads into what I write,
I have come to the immediate understanding that I can not stick to writing two posts a week, but I also understand that I most definitely need to try.
My last post was about having difficulty thinking, and it was unfortunately true. I think another part to my troubles in productivity involved my lack of enthusiasm for activating my mind and I will have to admit, without college, I sometimes feel completely lost. Graduating is like a breakup from a long relationship. Many people who are newly single after a period of two, maybe five years, of being one half of a couple tend to lose a sense of who they are now. Who they were was "So-and-so's boy/girlfriend|lover|partner|beau|Boo|babe|sweetheart|fiancee|...." Basically they were someone's someone. And now they're not.
I was the student of my school, for four (mostly) unforgettable years. I made triumphs, lost friends, made mistakes, went on adventures, laughed and cried, and bumbled messily through my classes. I envied others, and I learned to accept people for who they were....mostly. Now? Now I am a scared post-grad who feels clueless in what she's doing, stumbling through, making friends, going on adventures, laughing and crying, and making tri--wait! This sounds just like my time in college! Except... except I am in another country, surrounded by different people, and I am having to learn more responsibility. To be honest, this time is not all that different from when I went to university, I just have less people nearby me that are in the same situation. That is what brings me the most fear.
Anyways, now that I have had my slight mope-dump, here is some insight I would like to share: now that I am no longer someone's somebody, this opens opportunity for me to become who I am, and who I would like to be. Sure, I will make mistakes, and this won't be clean-cut, but life isn't meant to be that way. Also, it isn't meant to be easy, or else we wouldn't actually learn, or better yet, make progress.
Here's what I have learned so far from this past week:

• More people are keen to talk to me, and ask for classes
• Not only is there need for assistance in speaking and listening, but also in reading and writing.
• ^^I need to regress to when I learned reading and writing.
• January 20th marks my "Make-or-Break" day.
• If I fail at this, I am not a failure.
• The best friends I have may not always be available, but will be available when I most need them
• Who I know will get me further in this work than everything I do
• ^^^Everything I do can affect how who I know will work with me
• Exercise is my friend, but I need to learn how to schedule it
• Being afraid is normal, and having courage involves me do things I am afraid of doing, there is more reward in the outcome.
• The fear of failing is one of the biggest inhibitors to how I work. key words I need to learn: GET OVER IT
• aaaaaaand lastly: I am here not only to work, but to have a life experience that is meant to be enjoyable, therefore, I need to enjoy it. If I am not, then I need to change my approach.

For those who survived through my few epiphanies about struggling, and sludging about, you rock. In fact, you are part of my inspiration, as my "fan club." Those people are the best! Really, though, they are. These "fan club" people provide you with so much support even when you can not provide it for yourself. They also are really helpful when you are stuck with coming up with ideas. They do this by asking questions, some of which you may have not considered before, and then BOOM, now you can't stop doing what you do. So, thank you!
Pictures for you! Of my temple adventures, and New Year celebration at work. It's awesome.

First, a picture of the sunrise I saw arriving to the temple. Definitely worth waking up at five in the morning for.

People providing offerings to the monks before prayer.

 


A panoramic of the meditation room of the temple I stayed.....

There's a dress code, respect it.

There's even a women's temple for prayer, like for the female monks

In the mountains.....you get to see this.

Also, in Thailand, floating markets are a common tourist commodity. It's free for Thai people and residents who currently hold work permits. This one, was a little bit of a bust, only because I had seen the more interesting attractions before. Still, there were a few neat things!

There was a fun swinging bridge as well!

It was fun. And then the week began, a new department for observation. And celebrations. with pad thai, som tam (aka spicy papaya salad), and nam nueang (a finger food where you take a rice paper, and put ground pork, garlic, mango, pineapple, green banana, cucumber, chili, and a spicy sweet sauce, and wrap it up, and eat it)

As for more fearful things, I will need to something that has given me much stress to contemplate about, but needs to be done: to ask to start teaching a class with students soon: soon, as in in the next two weeks. I think the thing I fear most is failure. Though, with failure comes learning experience, and that I at least tried. And trying is more courageous than the act of not doing because of fear.

I will try to discuss more about my methods, and resource in the next few posts that I want to chug out, for those who are not only interested in what is going on, but want to know how to move forward. 

Until next time,

K.

16-12-2013 Weekends and the end of them.

FORENOTE: I know I have been much delayed with providing a sense of musical expression, I know. Right now, my skills are a little bit weak for identification, but I provide you with a playlist to listen to while you read. Enjoy, or just listen without reading. (By the way, if you haven't yet, and you like music, check out KEXP

Good morning/afternoon!
It's Monday and a start to another set of five days. While a new day is to new beginnings, what about new weeks? Should we claim that those are to new eras? Think about it, we will have our struggles, our triumphs (and they may be big), and we also have our shortcomings; Time goes forward and continues to do so endlessly. As people, we tend to look back on the past. This is not a bad thing, don't get me confused. Cultures look at their past to remember and hold onto what makes them that culture. Students learn of history of medicine, wars, and cultural movements, with hope by their prior generations that mistakes are not repeated. Then, some of us become stuck in our memories. While memories serve as our personal documentaries, always available for access, they can also limit us in moving forward in our lives; if we focus and hold on to what happened once in our lives and not to what is in the present, or the opportunities the future holds for us, then what are we doing? Even I admit that I have fallen into this rut of living in my memory and isolating myself from the world. The problem with this is that I tended to reside on what actions I could have taken, but didn't, to improve my present: who I talked to, how often I made an effort to keep in touch with others, my involvement in activities, my investments overall. As I keep trying to reexamine the possible pathways, I forget to tend to what I have going on now, my current friends, my family, where I am, and what I have accomplished.

The good news is that the people I do have remind me: of what I have and the good that is going on, not to mention their affirmative energy towards me. I am not sure how well I would be without the love and support from them, and I am always thankful, even when I forget to say each time I see them.
Let's talk about the past for a quick moment! The past, as in, this past weekend ( "ateet laew"). Friday was the start, and it was a great start. I gathered the nerves to ask a friend to go exercising with me and she introduced me to SiMuang Garden, an open park with sports fields and courts which were actively used by many people. Most of these people were teens and young adults, and that was a major change for me. Actually, what I witnessed was the most life and livelihood going on in one place for multiple recreational activities, and it was exhilarating. It gave me the energy to run three quarters of a mile after a week of no exercise due to the injury from my slip. Well, that, and the fact that it was seven in the evening, and the temperature was not in its peak. After that, my friend, as a celebration, took me to Mocha, a small and comfortable restaurant where I had my first traditional Thai Coffee ("olay-yen"). Oddly enough, many Thai people, my friend included, call the restaurant "Moo-sha," or "Moh-sha," which was funny to my ears, and my friend and I shared a good laugh about the pronunciation. Other people listened in, and joined in our frivolities of the word and it added to a good close to the evening.
Saturday continued my incurrence of new experiences. One of them being a noodle house that seemed to be popular, as it was filled with people every time I strolled by. This cued my temptation to try the food. One setback: it was all in Thai:the menus, the language of the employees, everything. Luckily, there was a good Samaritan who knew a little English to help me decide on what to order (noodles, rice, white type of noodle bowl, etc). With that, I was served noodles in a coconut bowl, mmm!

 Around 7:00P.M, my friend came by and we went to a festival celebrating the history of Rayong, in the old part of town.  

 

It was loud, and there was food everywhere, as well as street artists, and vendors of other sorts. Art galleries were of open access for the public, to which we wandered about and appreciated pieces. We also happened to run into many people Nai, my friend, knew. Apparently she knows a lot of people, and it was evident. While at the festival, we met with other associates of the hospital I am working at now, and all were very friendly. One of these friends even mentioned that another celebration would be happening the next weekend, at SiMuang Garden. (Is it possible that I may have new plans?) After the festival, we decided to grab a small bite to eat, and go home. We found a small food park/market to eat food,and made our way back for the evening.

 Vendors selling all sorts of pad Thai, friend rice, snacks and sweets.

Lights canopied the road, which was made of brick, and the road itself was congested with the traffic of people.

The lights! 

 At the festival, we even indulged in some nummy coconut water, freshly made and with bits of coconut! We even had the option to drink it out of bamboo shoots.

Children performed in cute dancing and lipsyncing numbers, with flashy lights!

 Some important people in the culture and history of Rayong: politicians and athletes!

At the entrance, we exited.

Sunday consisted mainly of errands and tasks. Getting Microsoft Office for my PC (Finally), craft supplies for Kevin, and binders and dividers for me, wahoo! Oh! And I received one of the best Christmas presents: a helmet. That way I can protect my head for the motor taxi treks I will need to make.

And on to the present. It is Monday, the start to the new work week, and so far, I think it was okay, and should be full of optimism. It is a week of integrated observation, and so far, I have had two signs of positivity: one, I took a motor taxi to work in the morning, and I asked for a ride, reciting the practiced phrase I was taught Friday, then asked for the price to agree on. The driver I asked told me that the price was 30 baht. This surprised me because my aunt informed me that the cost was 40 THB, and the first time I used the taxi, the cost was 40 THB. A ten baht discount without an exchange of bargaining is uplifting. Of course, when I told my aunt, she asked me if I flirted with the driver, and I chuckled and admitted with honesty that I didn't, having only stated what I was taught, and dressed appropriately. 

Maybe it was the red helmet.

At work, I met with a few of the employees of the Customer Service desk, introducing myself, and asking for introductions. I think that may be one of the most difficult things to do in socializing, making the first move to talk and get to know one another. Well, the good news is that, even in the short time I spent (about three and a half hours) at the department, I learned the names of five employees, and was able to communicate some ideas. I think that teaching gives the person trying to educate an idea of the how and the why to be patient in communication. After I spoke to one of the employees, her named pronounced 'Wah-nee,' I waited for about twenty to thirty seconds for her to respond, wearing a smile. With the time I gave her, she answered, her intentions clear, and even asked questions. When she finished her speaking, she looked at me, and smiled, a little shaky, but I also saw a spark of accomplishment; she knew that she tried. To me, trying is all that matters, even if it takes more time. In fact, rushing someone to speak in a language that is foreign to them creates a negative appeal to learning a new language, and creates an obstacle for the speaker, because they are now more focused on the speed of trying to respond rather than understanding what they are listening to, and what they need to say. Another employee, Fuki, is an interpreter. She works other parts of the department, such as registration and the customer service, but she also can help in the translation process for the hospital. Before today, we had shared a few exchanges of words, mostly where I greeted her with a polite "Why," a salutation, and asking her how she is. As of recently, we have expanded our topics of verbal exchange. This included her gaining the courage to invite me to join her and other employees for going to eat a meal in the evening. I joyously accepted the invitation because not only does it help her, this also helps me in making more friendships, which increases my confidence.
My mother often tells me that if something is meant to be, it will often work in your favor; if it is not, it will be arduous and beyond stubborn, so do not force it. I keep these words in my mind during times that are trying, and times where things seem to work out magically. This is one of those cases, and I think that if I am reading the signs correctly, it means that I am definitely where I need to be right now, and should continue to work hard to prove my worth, because other people are starting to notice it.

Until next time,
K.

10-12-2013. Two Day Tuesdays

For those out there reading, hello again! I hope all is well with you, wherever you may be; Though, to be honest, I think I am the most frequent visitor to this page.
Anyways, today was the second day in which I worked, and so far, it has not felt like work yet. I am not sure if this is a good or bad thing, but I am gaining some experience in the process of communicating, and in logging information.
My first day of work, it comprised more or less of consultations than teaching, and making audio recordings for me to review. As I progress with teaching and practice, I will be using audio for my students to practice their speaking, and to compare their progress from when they began learning, and throughout the course. It is one thing to try speaking, and it is another to listen to a recording of how you sound, because it is how you sound to others. I realize that I must be comfortable with how I sound when I speak, because I will be hearing my voice more and more often in recordings when I work with my students. Another thing I have come to understand is that I will be teaching not only different levels of English, but English for different purposes; right now, I am building lessons for TOEFL preparation for one student, speech preparation with time management and Standard English in addition to different types of language (formal, informal, and jargon) for another, and General English speaking/listening skills with department-specific terminology and practices for another group. Eek! I'm glad that I will be spending all day at the hospital to do this, and I can not wait to have a work permit in my hands (it will be like Christmas came to me!) and be established as an employee. While things have been moving slower than I would have preferred, I have received much moral support from friends and family, who couldn't express the saying better: "good things come to those that wait." Yes, I have waited, and I will remain patient, but at the same time, I will work my butt off so that I can help the people here improve their English-speaking skills, their confidence in their ability to speak it, and their opportunity to pass exams that measure English-speaking and competency!

Those who like pictures, I (finally) took one, but not of work, though I was in my workplace, and it is of food. I visited a cute coffee shop (of course I would) and found that this location also sold macaroons or, depending on how you spell it, macarons. One iced vanilla coffee ('gae fae vanilla yen'), six macaro(o)ns, and 225฿ later, I left.

The flavors, from left to right: Coffee, lemon, coffee, strawberry, blueberry, caramel.

I actually do not recall eating a macaro(o)n in my life, and so this was a first. I was not disappointed, having tried only the blueberry flavored one. It was light and aerated, the cookie, and the filling was rich in flavor, without that buttery feeling or taste that comes with eating heavy buttercream. The coffee, well, you just can't go wrong with coffee for me, and mine even came with foam and a pretty design on top. The atmosphere was very cutesy, and the associates there were very nice, which I think made up for the slightly steep price. (225THB= ~ 7.80USD) But then again, I do not buy macaro(o)ns on the daily, so I am no expert.

Anyways, my titles to each blog do clue in to what I am to discuss, and this post is no different, though maybe slightly mysterious in it's connection. While "Day 2 Tuesdays" would make much more sense, "Two day Tuesdays" just sounds better, eh? Plus, I would actually like to use this post to bring up one of my earlier posts. I will have to admit that there was much frustration applied in writing this article, and it was really frustration that had built over a few months, because of the fact that I felt very restricted from expressing my thoughts freely. In fact, the only person who expresses all their thoughts openly, without a care to whether they were nice or not, is my uncle. He says whatever he wants, expecting nobody to be upset or to catch him on his actions; if they happen to do so, he, as my aunt so vividly painted it, would bite their head off. It is extremely frustrating, and this behavior is understandable (but isn't really acceptable). It is understandable because it displays how he feels insecure about certain aspects of himself, where her feels vulnerable, and when an animal feels cornered or vulnerable, they attack. While it isn't acceptable, he has built his own paradigm which makes him think it is okay for him to react in such a way, but not for other people: he has built a small fortune for himself and his family and he has very few friends that he remains in contact with and opts to not socialize with others when the opportunity strikes him. These friends, of course, either are at his financial status or better, or they are a life-long friend that has stuck with him. Him not having many friends means less people that will be vocal about their ideas which may or may not oppose his; as for his financial state, this tends to give people egos, making them think they are better than others, therefore they do not need to listen to what other people say.

The problem, though, with having built this state of mind is that it increases the likelihood of eroding important relationships that one may already have. For example, I see my aunt, and she is not the person when I first met her. By outsiders, she is seen as the woman who 'tamed the beast' that is my uncle, but as time has passed, I have grown to understand that she has been patient and not tamed him, but tolerated him. Many of her activities seemed to have been limited in order to appease this said beast of a man and, while I do understand that in a marriage does involve compromise and the occasional giving up of something, I feel that she has given up more for him than he has for her, in things she likes to do. Examples of these "We go to different restaurants and he orders the same thing every time," or "He doesn't like it when I bring work home." As far as I have heard on his side: "I have never cheated on her." In a healthy relationship, each partner must accept certain aspects of the other, and give in their partner every now and then, the keyword being each. Not one person giving into the demands of the other. And fear should not be used against the other to get what they want. 

Speaking of relationships, I would like to say, that after four months of spending time together, the one I have with my six year old cousin has blossomed into a very close and loving relationship, and I feel that he has definitely started to make progress towards his independence. Last night, he slept in his own bed, all night. Although I do have to say that I shared his room with him so he felt more secure, but he did not go downstairs once. He even said that he wanted to sleep upstairs for tomorrow night! That was a major stride taken. From there, we will continue to work on him sleeping in his own room more often, and then sleeping by himself in his own room for the entirety of the night. Then he will eat all of his food on his own in a reasonable amount of time, and then he will be doing more things independent of his parents, like bathing himself, dressing himself, cleaning up after himself, etc. But for now, he work on one thing at a time.

An update on my legs, I have dressed my one large scrape for the third time. It is a weird feeling, removing the bandage, cleaning the wound, and then applying a new bandage. There is a weird numbness that I have when I remove part of the bandage that are closer to the wound opening, which is due to the swelling. I do hope that when the swelling of my injuries goes down, my ability to feel pressure is back to normal, else I may need to see a physician (how convenient that I work in a hospital!)

At this moment now, it is time that I return to my teachings, learnings, and the general upkeep. If you like to talk, I welcome questions, responses, and any thoughts or ideas that enter your brain while or after reading each post!

Until next time,
K