Today, I would like to indulge in the title of this post. As a part of many professions, it is an essential detail of the job to dedicate time for the purpose of 1) assisting a customer, 2) assisting a coworker 3) assisting our bosses, or 4) helping our workplace overall. With that in mind, we must learn how to manage our time. Yes, "Time Management", as if we can not get enough education or reiteration about the need to learn it. But really, we can't. In high school, we needed to learn time management so that we could accomplish studying for exams, playing on our school athletics teams, taking lessons to learn how to play a musical instrument, and maybe working a part-time job. That, of course, was majorly dedicated to Monday through Friday. Then comes college, and what a joy! You now have some freedom, right? Of course.....NOT. Here, your time management skills must evolve into not only studying and (maybe) a part-time job, but also paying taxes (if you hadn't already started paying them with that initial part-time job), finding an internship (or four), participating in the recreational sports team, joining a club, paying rent, and the most important part, having a social life!
After successfully achieving your undergraduate degree, it's time to run with 'big dogs,' and try to obtain your first "real-world" job, aka the one that you are supposed to take seriously, as it could move you on up the professional ladder in the work world. You've have some training from your college years, in trying to keep up with paying your living expenses and managing your time to turn in papers and projects while working, now you must try to put all of that hard-earned (and somewhat expensive) education to good use. The catch is, now you must be doing it without the training wheels that your parents had provided. For many of the American readers, that means, the people reminding us when our rent is due, asking how much it is for the month, and providing a check; or reminding us about when our taxes are due and helping us calculate and file our taxes. For the first few years in this so-called "real world," we still have the assistance provided from our parents with learning how to file taxes, because only a few fine people in the States really understand how that works. For the other aspects of life, we learn the statement, "I gave you the essentials, now you're on your own, kid."
Now, in the world of so-called adults, we must learn how to balance our professional life with our social life. Humans are naturally social creatures. We need to bond with somebody in order to be content with the life we have. We also need to work in order to support ourselves and try to survive (with dignity or pride). Sometimes the professional workplace acts as a social environment as well, satiating that need to communicate and connect with another. Other times, it doesn't. This is where the time management skills are necessary. One must learn to balance working with meeting new people, participating in a club, going out with friends, or going on a date with your possible life partner. Not only does your social life include the meeting people, but also exercising. As you get older, exercise becomes more important to maintain your desired body shape and health. Of course, you can always get two birds with one stone and combine exercising with going out with friends.
Now, for me, my purpose of traveling was to gain life experiences and possibly add more skills to my resume. When I first came to Thailand, the only people I knew were my aunt, uncle, and cousin. So, I had a very small social circle. Not only did I have a small network, but, when it came to the socialization with other people, they did not expand much. This was safe and it was something I knew. At first, it was okay, but as time went on, and there was no progression in expanding my network (partially my fault), I went out on my own to start meeting people and not staying in a bubble. Luckily, my efforts were met with success, as I starting exchanging contact information and making plans with new people. More people means more socialization. I also received more work (private tutoring), which is definitely a plus. Now, with pleasure of making friends and being able to go out comes responsibility of needing to know when to say "no" to an invitation. For the very social people, it is quite difficult to say no to joining someone for an outing, but as part of growing up and time management, when you have a major project that is important to your income, you must place that higher in your list of priorities over hanging out with a person with whom you can see after you finish. Of course, this can become more difficult if said person is moving, or has a limited time in which they will also be available. Decision-making in life isn't always easy, no matter how old you are.
On to my final point, I really want to talk about making time for yourself. My current work involves a lot of socialization and a lot of talking, both are things that I love and happen to be pretty decent at doing. I have the joy to do this every day, Monday through Sunday, with all age groups, skill levels, and multiple cultures (Thai and Russian). It's wonderful. Now, while it is great, and I love the talking, and I get to socialize at work and with friends outside of work, I also need to reserve time to being by myself, hence the title, including "Self-Love." As people, we must find a little bit of time to be by ourselves and "reboot." Being out with people is great, especially when you are not working, but when we spend a lot of time giving it to others, we aren't able meditate on our personal self. I know it sounds weird and maybe doesn't make sense but think about this situation:
You are writing a message, essay, or just something, and you are simultaneously talking to a friend. After a few minutes of talking, you look down at what you wrote and realize that some of the conversation you had with your friend (or what your friend said) has been written in the message. Your brain had been too busy receiving information, that it couldn't correctly put out what you intended.That's what I mean by needing some alone time. If you need a better explanation, consider Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs
This is especially important in the contribution to my third level of needs: Love/Belonging. Part of my contributions to friendship is my creativity in cooking. I love cooking, and I love developing the new dishes, or experimenting.
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Going back to time management, it can be quite difficult to make time for myself because I am fairly busy making time for other OR making preparations for the time I am making for others. If you haven't picked it up from this post, a lot of my time, whether is is at work, or outside of work, is dedicated to others. Even with this schedule, I would like to add more events in, like running a marathon or volunteering, and learning how to manage that time, is extremely important, because I still need to reserve time for myself. So, don't forget, it is important to remember to make time for yourself, not only for others. You're not selfish if you do, you're self-saving.
Until next time,
K.
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